I always thought jury duty was something you could politely decline. Like fruitcake. But recently, being summoned, I discovered that “jury service is not voluntary but a civic duty imposed upon all citizens pursuant to civil code section 204.” Desperate,…
Blog Archives
So It Goes – Dominican Republic
My amiga Yahaira wanted to show me her homeland, the Dominican Republic, where 62,000 of her relatives live. We met them all at the airport, a metric ton of strangers hugging me as their own. The DR comes in two…
So It Goes – Televisions
Is it just me, or are TVs taking over the universe? They’re popping up in gas stations, waiting rooms, supermarkets, banks, beauty salons, HOTEL BATHROOMS. I myself don’t need a bathroom TV because I keep one in my underwear. “For…
So It Goes
Stereo Type My neighbor across the street—the one who flies a pirate flag—is playing his music again. The volume is set on eleven. It’s never good music either; it’s always angry shouting by groups like Death Ass or Vomit. The…
So It Goes – Bingo!
Bingo “Let’s go to bingo!” “Um. Okay.” I didn’t know that young people could play bingo. I thought there was an age minimum, a picture of grandma reading, “You must be this old to enter building.” As we pulled into…
So It Goes by Jason Love
Sports It’s that time again-time to isolate half of you by talking about sports. It’s just that sports is the only thing on TV that doesn’t make me want to jump out a window. My addiction started early, in pee…
So It Goes – Driving
by Jason Love, Syndicated Humor Columnist Driving When people see me drive, they have questions. For example, “What kind of idiot are you?” Well, I’m not the kind who keeps passing cars on the onramp until it becomes a merging…
So It Goes
by Jason Love, Syndicated Humor Columnist The Wide, Wide World of Competitive Eating Ever since curling found its way into the Olympics, our concept of sport has so devolved that ESPN is now televising darts. Call me old-fashioned, but when…
So It Goes – April 09
By Jason Love Population We’ve heard some bleak reviews of the human race, but deep down I think that people are generally… everywhere. Especially during rush hour. It’s not that people are bad; we’re just a little bit squished. Remember…
So It Goes – Artsy Mom
My mom has always been creative. A long time ago-back when “Saturday Night Live” was funny-she’d decorate cakes to look like soccer fields, pyramids, women endowed with Hostess Sno-Balls.You lost your innocence early in my home. Mom works for the…
So It Goes – Camping
Someone suggested that I take a long walk on a short pier… “You need to lighten up, man.” That was Yahaira. She used to be my wife; now she’s my best friend (she got demoted after our divorce). Yahaira lives…
So It Goes – Norton Virus
It was a typical day—chop wood, carry water—when I got a pop-up from Symantec: “Your Norton virus definitions are about to expire. Renew now?” I thought virus definitions went on forever like the giant tortoise or Dick Clark. Evidently, they…
So It Goes – Sperm Count
Due to technical difficulty, I scheduled with Dr. Klope a sperm count. Talk about tedious jobs. Can you see that poor guy over the microscope? “1,634… 1,635… wait, did I count that one?” Dr. Klope had one opening, eight a.m.,…
Tagged with: humor article, humor columnist, insemination, jason love, relationship, reproduction, sperm, sperm count
Posted in So It Goes
Posted in So It Goes
