The American Society of Microbiology performed a study that showed that only 75% of women and only 58% of men washed their hands after using a public restroom.

The Minnesota Department of Health led a study at the 2003 Minnesota State Fair. Only 65% of females and 39% of males washed their hands.

Well, I’m here to tell you it ain’t just Minnesota, and it ain’t just state fairs.

It’s amazing. I’m washing up, and in the mirror I see guy after guy zipping up and heading for the door.

Didn’t their mothers teach them to wash their hands?

It’s disgusting. It’s pure Dark Ages. What’s the issue here?

If it’s a restaurant bathroom: What are you, going to handle your bread with hands that just got finished handling something else?

If it’s a movie bathroom: What are you, going to go back out and share the popcorn bucket with your sweetie, reaching in a hand that just got finished reaching for something else?

How would you like to be on the receiving end of that kind of thoughtlessness, or laziness, or whatever you want to call it?

Once I saw a little boy of around five years old straining and stretching to wash his hands in a public bathroom. It was no easy task for the little guy to reach that faucet. If this kid could do it, why can’t these people?

Are they lazy? Stupid? Does it somehow please them go about with germs on their hands? Are they passive-aggressive sleazoids out to make people sick?

Ladies, you can help matters along here. When he gets back from the bathroom, ask him point blank if he washed up. Make him go back if he gives the wrong answer. Better yet, carry hand sanitizer around with you and get him into the habit.

I mean, what is the problem with washing your hands?

Many illnesses are passed along that could be prevented by this simple act. For example, the Norwalk Virus. You’ve heard of it. It shuts down cruise ships and restaurant chains, and one way to prevent it is thought to be food-handlers washing up properly after using the bathroom. Doesn?t that tell you something?

Here’s another one these geniuses may never have heard of: THE COMMON COLD, which can live on your hands for hours after a sneeze. That is, hours after you’ve sneezed into your palm, wiped your sloppy self with your hand, and then didn’t wash up.

Of course, it’s not just guys. I once shook hands with a sniffling, sneezing lady selling door to door. I was sick for the next ten days with one of the worst cold strains I’ve ever had. Think I bought anything from her the next time she came around?

I used to wonder why some people carried hand sanitizer. Now I know. They’re not Howard Hughes crazies. They’re people who can’t afford to get sick for ten days and lose ten days’ pay.

I remember a “Far Side” cartoon where the guy comes out of the bathroom and a sign goes off over the door: “Didn’t Wash Hands,” so the whole restaurant could see it.
Frankly, I think it’s a fine invention. If you don’t, then you know what you need to do.

Wash your hands!

Article brought to you by: Somebody Who Washes His Hands