(And Special Answers to Questionable Questions) By Will…I WILL GO FAR!!!…Fargo Dear Will, How come you never see pepperoni on anything but pizza? Doesn’t that seem strange to you? I don’t know why, Will, but I worry about stuff like…
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Will Fargo’s Bogus Advice
Dear Will, I’m thinking of making a New Year’s resolution this year that will really make a difference in my life. But I’m coming up short with ideas. You see, I can’t really think of anything about me that needs…
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Will Fargo’s Bogus Advice – Public Disturbance
Dear Will Fargo, I am a person who loves a good beat. When I hear a good beat, my foot just gets to tapping and I can’t seem to do anything about it. And then when one foot gets to…
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Will Fargos Bogus Advice – Curious Shopper
Dear Will, How come every time I go grocery shopping I get a cart with one bad wheel? It never fails. And then when I try and push the cart it always seems to want to go a different way…
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Will Fargos Bogus Advice – Confused Loyalties
Dear Will, My friends think I’m crazy because I feed my dog steak. But I don’t see anything wrong with it. After all, he’s the best buddy I’ve ever had! What do they think, he’s some sort of animal or…
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Will Fargos Bogus Advice – Googlable
Dear Will, The other day, I tried googling myself but my browser couldn’t come up with crap. It seems like everyone I know is googlable except me. And so they’re all cool and I’m a nobody.I don’t know if I…
Will Fargos Bogus Advice – Taco Bell Flautist
Dear Mr. Fargo, I am working really hard so that someday I will have time to be creative and play my flute as much as I want. That is my dream. The problem is I decided to take a job…
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Will Fargos Bogus Advice – Cat Relationship
Dear Will, I have a problem with my cat. It seems she is sleeping about 23 hours a day. Do you think she might have chronic fatigue syndrome or a sleep disorder or something? Should I enroll her in a…
Tagged with: advice, cat, humor columnist, relationship, will fargo
Posted in Will Fargo's Bogus Advice
Posted in Will Fargo's Bogus Advice
Will Fargos Bogus Advice – Mother Nature
Dear Will, Now that spring is here, I thought I’d be happy. But I’m not. In fact, spring is having an opposite effect on me. The singing, chirping, and warbling birds are grating on my nerves, Will! And I find…
Will Fargo’s Bogus Advice – Groundhog Day
Editor’s note: The following is a reprint of Will Fargo’s Bogus Advice. Will is pulling a Rip Van Winkle somewhere in the Butterfly Sanctuary in Pacific Grove and can’t be disturbed. Please, don’t go looking for him. You’ll disturb his…
Will Fargo’s Bogus Advice – New Years Resolution
Dear Will, I’m thinking of making a New Year’s resolution this year that will really make a difference in my life. But I’m coming up short with ideas. You see, I can’t really think of anything about me that needs…
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December Is So Awful
Dear Will Fargo, I really dread the winter coming. Especially the month of December. I can’t stand all the phony holiday crap with Santa Claus and the Elves and all that North Pole garbage. Can’t we just skip all that…
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Will Fargo’s Bogus Advice – Flowers and Thanksgiving Vegans
Dear Will Fargo, Where have all the flowers gone? Signed, Feeling nostalgic for summer already… in Carmel Valley Dear Feeling nostalgic for summer already… in Carmel Valley, Is this a loaded question, Carmel Valley? Perhaps some psychological test you’re trying…
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Bogus Vice
Dear Will Fargo, I have always been someone who plays by the rules. I’m honest, hardworking, and law abiding. The problem is I have no way to de-stress and friends tell me I’m dull. Therefore, I think I need a…
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Zshberkle Pleads
Dear Will, My name is Zshberkle. I come from the planet Zorak. I have a problem only you can solve, Will Fargo. I believe you know the beings who claim to be my progenitors, Zshbelzagub and Zshbula from the planet…
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Will Fargo’s Bogus Advice – August 07
Editor’s note: The following is an encore presentation of Will Fargo’s Bogus Advice. Will did not send in a column this month. He was abducted by space aliens. Foolish Times is currently negotiating his safe release. Dear Will Fargo, Will…
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Letter for July 07
Dear Will Fargo, My name is Zshbula. I come from the planet Zorak. I have to tell you that of all the earthlings I have ever seen, I find you the most attractive. Even though I’ve never actually seen you.…
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