July 2008

The Golf Ball

July 2, 2008

In my hand I hold a ball… white and dimpled, rather small… Oh, how bland it does appear… this harmless-looking little sphere… By its size I could not guess… the awesome strength it does possess…

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Nobody Does It Like Beckham

July 2, 2008

I may have to start shopping at Macy’s again. Oh, not for the clothes, but to thank them for AT LAST placing an ad in the “San Francisco Chronicle” that women can adore.Macy’s soft-core ads of females have appeared in the “Chron” for years. You know the ones-a nubile young thing wearing the latest in [...]

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Tony’s Ticklers – The Tale of Flynn

July 2, 2008

Flynn staggered home very late after another evening with his drinking buddy, Paddy. He took off his shoes to avoid waking his wife, Mary.He tiptoed as quietly as he could toward the stairs leading to their upstairs bedroom, but misjudged the bottom step. As he caught himself by grabbing the banister, his body swung around [...]

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Will Fargos Bogus Advice – Googlable

July 2, 2008

Dear Will, The other day, I tried googling myself but my browser couldn’t come up with crap. It seems like everyone I know is googlable except me. And so they’re all cool and I’m a nobody.I don’t know if I can take one more day of being a non-googlable putz. I think I may just [...]

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Hommage Au Fromage

July 2, 2008

Aged like my grandfather’s wind-up Victrola, I love the scent of a fine Gorgonzola. Velveeta’s cheap and tastes much cruder. Substitute a wedge of Gouda. Cheddar’s sharp but eggs taste better Mixed with salty cheese like Feta; Add a chunk of warm bologna Topped with shredded provolone.

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