August 2007

Editors Note August 07

August 1, 2007

What? Time for another Editor’s Note? I just got finished with the last one! Seems like it, at any rate. Time does fly. It’s been a whole year since I started editing the Foolish Times. Back in those days, we were known as the Monterey County Fool. Maybe you remember. It was crazy times. Housing [...]

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Our Fourth Year

August 1, 2007

Wow! It’s hard to believe this issue starts our fourth year of publication. To celebrate we’re having a party (any excuse will do). Our advertisers have graciously contributed over a thousand dollars in prizes and a surprise or two. Come join us on Sunday, August 19th at Mexcal restaurant. Free food (to die for), music, [...]

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Fool-O-Scope – August 07

August 1, 2007

August birthdays: In Europe, August is a holiday month. No one works and the whole continent pretty much shuts down for vacation. Now, if only America would get with the program and appropriately honor your birthday month. ARIES (3/21 – 4/19) National Aviation Week honors early aviation pioneers like famous Aries Orville Wright and Neil [...]

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Dear Mr. NSA

August 1, 2007

by Rosie Sorenson’s Dear Mr. NSA, I want to thank you for eavesdropping on me. No, really. I’ve long said that what we all need is a “Good Listening To!” And, there you are! Hour after tedious hour tuning into my conversations. For just a few billion dollars, I now know that someone cares enough [...]

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Salvage Angels

August 1, 2007

Twenty or so years ago when I was in college and taking a creative writing class, I invented a being called the Salvage Angel. Salvage angels are a branch of the angel family tree. The hierarchy of angels as understood by any given society tends to reflect that society. I suspect that salvage angels are [...]

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Will Fargo’s Bogus Advice – August 07

August 1, 2007

Editor’s note: The following is an encore presentation of Will Fargo’s Bogus Advice. Will did not send in a column this month. He was abducted by space aliens. Foolish Times is currently negotiating his safe release. Dear Will Fargo, Will Fargo? The Will Fargo? My Will Fargo? Will, does the name Cloy ring a bell? [...]

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Fool Laughs – August 07

August 1, 2007

Freshly coined jokes, with a few encore presentations sprinkled in. Under the Table A man and woman were having dinner in a fine restaurant. Their waitress, taking another order at a table a few steps away, suddenly noticed that the man was slowly sliding down his chair and under the table, but the woman acted [...]

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Best of The Inbox – August 07

August 1, 2007

A virtual smorgasbord of jokes and otherwise funny stories e-mailed to FoolishTimes. Laws of the Natural Universe Law of Mechanical Repair: After your hands become coated with grease, your nose will begin to itch. Law of the Workshop: Any tool, when dropped, will roll to the least accessible corner. Law of Probability: The probability of [...]

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August

August 1, 2007

August is the last full month of summer and is named after a Roman dictator, Caesar Augustus. Before he took power he was just a punk named Octavian. After he took office, he could have your head cut off and mounted as a hubcap on a chariot wheel unless you called him August, which also [...]

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Update on the Unknown Cartoonist

August 1, 2007

Still no information on the talented, mysterious, and elusive Unknown Cartoonist. We had a tip about a guy in Café Noir, but when we investigated it turned out to be just your garden-variety doodler, nowhere near as talented as UC. We asked you tell us the meaning of the cartoon on page 12 of last [...]

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Limericks – August 07

August 1, 2007

A mouse in her room woke Miss Dowd. She was frightened, it must be allowed. Soon a happy thought hit her To scare off the critter: She sat up in bed and meowed. —Somebody, I Forget His Name

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Letters to Letcher – My Big Summer Blockbuster

August 1, 2007

Editor’s note: Tim Letcher is a well-connected media mogul to whom people submit their outlandish money-making ideas. He sometimes shares the best of these with readers of Foolish Times. Here’s a movie idea he recently came across. Yet another summer of wonderful movies. I’ll call it (like it is every year) the “Summer of Sequels.” [...]

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Not Amused by Amusement Parks

August 1, 2007

I was practically certain that I was too old for amusement parks. My spouse loves amusement parks. He is a big, overgrown kid who still wants to ride on the rides. I tolerate them. We heard about an amusement park in Chattanooga. It is not too far away and it seemed like a good weekend [...]

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